A letter to my crush

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“Dear Law School Boy,

Hi. How are you?

I have something important to tell you. I guess it’s not that important. To me it is. I guess at the end of this you can judge whether or not its important to you or not.

Anyway, here it goes.

I have a crush on you.

It started when I first met you. You’re really tall, by the way. I like that you’re tall. Usually I don’t really care, but I your height suits you.

I like your dark curly and unruly hair. I want to run my fingers through it when I see you, but I don’t. Mostly because I don’t want you to think I’m crazy but partly because I can’t reach it easily.

I’m sad that the first time I met you was a week before I moved to Washington, DC for 10 months. I wish you had come out with your friend’s before that so I could have gotten to know you more before leaving. I’m really glad we kept in touch when I left even though you had only met me once. We bonded over hockey. You were the only one I could really talk about hockey with, but don’t worry that isn’t the only reason why I have a crush on you.

I like your eyes. Aww that was sappy.

I like that you’re smart but like ridiculous movies like Paul. (Everyone told me that you made them go see it. I like that you did that, too.)

I like that when I came back to visit, you hung out with me and gave me a hug, even though we only met in person once.

I like that when I moved back, you were excited to hang out with me and talked to me in the kitchen for a half hour. I like that you offered your good beer to me, too.

I like that you waited outside and talked to me for an hour before my friend picked me up to take me home. I like that we talked about science fiction for that hour. I hate that I called you by your last name and not your first name. I feel really lame for doing that. Sorry dude. I hope I made up for it and that you don’t hate me. I guess it was kind of funny. I wasn’t even drunk!

I like that you were my beer pong partner at your party. I like that you said I could pass out on the couch section that was in your room too when it was not even midnight.

I like that you got excited about watching New Girl and fell asleep on the couch with me after indulging in adult beverages that one Thursday night. I don’t know if you know this, but I was really nervous. Our hands were almost touching. I remember every detail of that night.

I like that you hung out with me and the guys the last Tuesday that I was in town. I like that you sat with me in the morning. I like that you gave me a really long, big hug before you left for work.

I don’t like that I moved 2,625 miles away.

I like that you texted me 3 days later to tell me that you finished one of the books I left on your doorstep when I was leaving. I like that you’re actually reading the books I left you.

I like that you gave me hockey updates when I was in Colorado.

I like that feeling I get when I see a text from you; you know like butterflies are in my stomach. That feeling you get when someone asks you to dance in middle school. I like when your messages say something witty. I laughed when you said that bit about the pumpkins after pumpkinfest.

I like that you tell me that everyone misses me. I miss you too. Sometimes I think about you telling me that you miss me instead of saying ‘everyone’ or ‘Pittsburgh’.

I like that you said visiting over spring break was an option.

I like that you’ll never find out about this crush. I think it’s better that way. I’m not sure I would feel the same way if you did know. I’m funny like that.

Anyway. There was that.




3 thoughts on “A letter to my crush

    A selfish review of 2011 « paperballpotluck said:
    December 20, 2011 at 12:17 am

    […] Since I left DC on August 31, life has been a whirlwind of craziness between weddings, interviews, trips, and moving. I wasn’t actually planning on moving to San Francisco until January, but I somehow landed a job that started in October. Wow. That was fast. I had the chance to cram in some fun in Pittsburgh before heading out to the West Coast and leaving my East Coast life behind (for now). I got to celebrate a friendiversary (It’s an anniversary but for friends!) with our law school friends after a glorious time at the Steel City Big Pour. Yup, one of the very same law school boys written about here. […]

    dreamerrambling said:
    December 3, 2013 at 12:42 pm

    This was so sweet. I swear to god, I almost bawled my eyes out because I was thinking about my high school crush the entire time. Except I never talked to the damn boy. Yeah, I’m weird like that. Here’s to idealism. *toasts*

      paperballpotluck responded:
      December 3, 2013 at 5:20 pm

      I’m so glad you liked it!! Sometimes its really hard to talk to crushes. You’ll be able to talk to everyone around them, and then when they walk up to you, NOPE!

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